A: No...I just finally came to my senses.
I can't tell you how many times I've heard that phrase in the past month or so - ever since I went public with the news that Mortgage Partner and I will be pulling the trigger on this relationship thing. (Not to be confused with "pulling the plug..." In my cartoon head, "pulling the trigger" is akin to "finalizing," whereas the former is more like "abandoning." Yeah: I am a cheesy romantic sap - I know.)
Some of the more memorable verbal reactions:
"Get the fuck out of here! Cranial Midget is NOT getting married!!!" I heard this one through the phone line, as a good friend's wife (who probably knows me better through "reputation" than through reality) was told of the news.
"Excuse me?" said a co-worker. He then turned around so his ass was facing me, and said, "Could you tell me if pigs are flying out my butt?"
"Well, I guess we can finally put the door back on its hinges," said an old friend, referring to a semi-public facility where - a long time ago, when I was in my late-teens/early twenties - I would often go to have sex. Seedy stuff: it was the back room of a gathering place and the table, which took up most of the space in the small room, was just the right height. The old crusty bass turds who ran the place (and who weren't getting laid) were jealous and decided to take the door off its hinges.
And, just last weekend, I was given this gem: "Can I tell you something? Something my mom always sat me down and told me whenever I had been dating a boy for more than a few months?" asked a friend. "The fucking stops and the fighting starts when you get married. Don't ever get married, darling. That was about the only advice my mother ever offered me...now I offer it to you."
"Wow. That is so awesome! I never thought I'd live to see the day...she must be pretty special. You two must have a lot of fun together," exclaimed one of my less-jaded friends.
Yeah...yes she is. And yes - yes we do.
Having Mortgage Partner in my life is like getting a whole new box of crayons and a brand new coloring book, adding dimensions to my existence I never knew...opening my eyes to colors I didn't know were there.
And: she doesn't mind the fact that I still can't (won't?) draw inside the lines! (Although she prefers it when I do.)
3 comments:
Haha.. you two are ah-Dore-eebleh (yes, that is french!)
One thing I can tell you, regarding Mr. Negative's comment... it's all bull-crud on a stick. the sex gets better and you can finally relax! yeah baby!
8-8-8 all the way!
I had not thought of that door removal deal for a long time. What a hoot.
I noticed, last time I saw you two together, an easy comfortableness. It was in an arm draped here, an eye glance there, a lack of tension in body language with a half cup of tenderness and a teaspoon of endearment. If I didn't know better, I'd think you are already enjoying some of the benefits of making the long term commitment, of being in it for the long haul.
Aww...shucks. The truth is out: After we moved in together, our relationship got a little better than it had been (with a few hiccups in the beginning) before. Once we "engaged" it a couple/three months ago, it went up another notch. It seems to keep growing these friggin blossoms that end up surprising us with their beauty. Glad it shows.
Post a Comment